How to Create (Instead of Find) Your Purpose in Life

Photo by Tom on Pexels.com

Photo by Tom on Pexels.com

We all have a reason for being.

The French call it Raison d’être. The Japanese call it Ikigai. In modern times, we refer to it as purpose or calling.

Purpose is important because it’s our reason for being.

It’s what brings meaning to our lives at the present time.

And yet, a lot of the time, readers ask me:

“I’m struggling with finding my purpose. Any tips?”

I understand. I felt the same way throughout my 20’s—I still do sometimes.

What makes it worse is the perception that everyone else around you seems to have it figured out.

Your colleagues are thriving in their careers. Your friend just left their corporate job to travel the world in hopes of starting her own social project overseas. Another friend who was not satisfied with his life three years ago decided to ‘take the leap’ and he’s now built a successful business for himself.

Everyone seems to have it figured out, but in truth, no one really does.

Because here’s a little secret:

No one is 100% certain that what they are doing with their life is what they are “meant” to do.

Not even those that seem to have it all together.

Everyone deals with the voice of doubt and the fear of failure. The only difference between people who have a deep conviction for their purpose and those who don’t is that the former are willing to persevere despite the troubles. That’s it. They identified what it is they want their purpose to be—they created it—and then they went ahead and relentlessly pursued it.

They didn’t ask themselves the question of “how do I find my purpose?” Instead, they asked this question:

“What do I want to contribute to this world?”

And then they set sail in its direction.

That’s the thing about purpose:

Purpose is not something you find, it’s something you create.

In this article, I want to show you how you can create your purpose, and it begins with addressing three areas of your life: your passions, your skills, and your beliefs about the world.


1. Passions: “What do I Enjoy Doing?”

If you ask people what their advice for success is, one of the most common pieces is this:

“Do what you love.”

Such a concept rests on the notion that we all know what we love.

But what if we don’t? And what if we love many things?

A more realistic approach begins with this question:

“What do I enjoy doing?”

Here are some questions to help you dig deeper:

  1. What kind of books do I love to read?

  2. What can I talk about for hours and not get bored?

  3. What activities do I get so “lost” in, that I lose track of time?

  4. What are some creative activities that I’ve been doing regularly over the past few years?

  5. What excites me about life?

  6. What excites me at work? What’s a project I would jump on instantly and why?

  7. What topics spark my curiosity and light me up? What do you gravitate towards?

  8. What drains my energy and stresses me out?

Once you’ve answered your questions, go through the words you listed and circle the most reoccurring ones. Look for common themes and then identify your top three.

For example, my reoccurring themes included:

Storytelling, writing, ideas, creative pursuits, self-development, inspiration, positivity, sustainability, entrepreneurship, travel, photography…

And so my top 3 themes were as follows:

  • Personal Growth: I enjoy reading books on this topic and talking about it.

  • Inspirational Words: I enjoy writing, listening to (and engaging in) positive inspirational talks.

  • Creativity: I get excited about anything related to creative communities and ideas that drive positive social and sustainable change.


2. Skills: “What am I Good at?”

Passion is the first part of the equation. The second zooms in on skills and asks this question:

“What am I good at?”

The idea is simple: Life is too short to focus your energy on things you’re not good at.

You want to double down on what you’re good at—that’s how you can become “great” at something.

So, this is where you list all the things you’re good at.

Here are some questions to help you dig deeper:

  1. What comes easy to me?

  2. What are tasks that others find challenging but are not as difficult for me?

  3. What are some areas in my life that I quickly thrive in?

  4. What are some areas in my work that I quickly thrive in?

  5. How would my colleagues describe me at work?

Again—once you’ve answered your questions, go through the listed words and circle the most reoccurring ones. Look for common themes and then identify your top three.

When I asked myself these questions, here’s what I found:

I’m good at connecting with people. I’m good at listening to people’s stories and helping them see things from a different perspective. My colleagues at Google used to call me Sunshine because I was their source of positive energy. I gave an inspirational talk at a conference once and received a standing ovation. I wrote a few blog posts a few years ago and the few people who read it told me I should pursue writing.

So here are my three themes:

  • Positive thinking

  • Presentations and public speaking

  • Writing


3. Beliefs: “What do I Believe The World Needs?”

The final part of the equation relates to your beliefs.

It asks the question of:

“What do I believe the world needs?”

Here are some questions to ask yourself:

  • What message do I want to share with the world?

  • What are the values I stand for?

  • What do I want people to do more of in this world?

One more time—once you’ve answered your questions, go through the listed words and circle the most reoccurring ones. Look for common themes and then identify your top three.

Here’s what I came up with:

  • Conscious living: I believe people should be more mindful of their impact on the environment and how it affects humanity—we need more positive social change

  • Fearless living: I believe that we shouldn’t be afraid to try new ideas, seek new life experiences, and do things differently

  • Self-awareness: I believe we need re-connect with ourselves and tap into a higher conscious level of thinking—especially in this digital-first world


4. The Intersection Point: “What do I Want to Contribute?”

Now that you know what you enjoy doing, what you’re good at, and what message you’d want to send out to the world, it’s time to find the intersection point.

When you circle your most reoccurring words and compare your top themes, you are bound to find an intersection point.

For me it was clear that I should focus on these areas: inspirational words (written and spoken), creativity, and personal growth. That’s my intersection point—where what I enjoy meets what I’m good at meets what I believe the world needs more of”.

And then, ask yourself this question:

“What do I want to contribute to this world?”

My answer was simple: Positive, encouraging words that will help dreamers and doers thrive.

And so I created my purpose: To use my words to inspire growth in others.

 
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5. One Thing: “What’s The One Thing I Can do to Get Started?”

Once you’ve put it all together, the most important step is what you do after.

Ask yourself:

“What’s the one thing I can do right now to get started?”

If you’re passionate about healthy living and creativity, you’re good at videography, and you believe that the world needs to go vegetarian, then your purpose could be to educate and inspire people to lead a vegetarian lifestyle. You can start by launching a YouTube channel and creating content online.

If you’re passionate about communities and travel experiences, you’re good at organizing events, and you believe that the world needs more workshops that spark creative thinking, then your purpose could be to build a community of conscious travelers who are interested in creative workshops. You can start by organizing a yearly retreat.

My purpose is to use my words to inspire growth in others. What’s the one thing I can do right now to get started?

Write.

And so, I write.

In the future, I can expand into other mediums, but for now—I’m focused on this one thing.

Stop overthink everything! Make a decision, stick with it and start small—take one step forward.

“As you start to walk on the way, the way appears.”—Rumi

All big things in life started with small beginnings.

Don’t overwhelm yourself with the profoundness of your purpose. Choose one thing and start walking. Soon enough, that one thing will transform into something beautiful—your contribution to this world, your purpose.